Mary in Managua

I am sitting here at the Kolker’s kitchen table when I should be sleeping…but I am just so excited, I can’t possibly go to bed! This post won’t have any pictures because my camera is tucked away somewhere in my luggage in the room where Yakelin is currently sleeping. The last two days have been overwhelmingly difficult but equally rewarding. I haven’t blogged much before now about how I’ve felt in Tulsa with Yakelin. All I can say is that it has been very challenging emotionally, physically, and spiritually.

Yesterday was one of the hardest days for Yakelin and I because we had several disagreements and spent most of the day in awkward silence (not the kind of news you want to hear from the person that is supposed to be caring for Yakelin). When I noticed Yakelin was distant I tried to approach her but she wasn’t ready to talk. She spent a good portion of the day teary and withdrawn. I was frustrated, at a loss for how to handle the situation, and basically spent.

Later, after going on a shopping outing with Sally to the Goodwill store and having a Pei Wei’s Asian Diner dinner, we were left alone in our “home” for the evening. At just the right moment I received a call from my dear friends Alcides and Sileny Fuentes in Nicaragua. They knew it had been a tough day and offered sound counsel and encouragement which gave me a sense of direction and new strength. They reminded me that Yakelin was probably experiencing culture shock. When I heard this, it made perfect sense! The main symptoms of culture shock are frustration, tension, embarrassment, and confusion. Signs include isolation and withdrawal. This is exactly what I had seen in her over the past week but had not identified it as part of culture shock.

Although I still sensed tension between Yakelin and I, after the conversation with the Fuentes, I offered her a quick good-night hug as I have each night. In that moment she broke down and hugged me tightly. She asked me for forgiveness and bawled. We spent the next two hours talking about her life, God’s evident intervention in her life, even through the conviction of sin, and the effects of culture shock.

She shared she had never in her life asked anyone for forgiveness,

but once she did, she said the knot in her stomach and the uneasiness that she had experienced for most of the day immediately dissipated. She also shared that the times that I had asked for her forgiveness during the last week had made an impact on her. I am amazed at the God that uses even my sin and my response to it as a teaching tool to draw Yakelin into a closer relationship with Him. We ended our two hour marathon chat by kneeling at the bedside giving thanks to God for all He had done and for her upcoming surgery. I thank God for His work in both of our lives and for the gracias support we have received from so many people.

Today we met with a Hispanic pastor that came to our home and listened to and prayed for Yakelin. He invited us to his church and Yakelin was super excited about going to a service in Spanish (she was pretty bored during the English service we went to on Sunday). After our time with Pastor Sandor, we packed our bags and headed to the Kolker’s house. We plan to stay in their home for a few days after the surgery. Dr. Kolker is an optometrist and has been instrumental in securing surgeons, a surgical center, and eye hardware for Yakelin’s case. We discovered tonight that Yakelin is quite intelligent. She had memorized most of Psalm 23 after studying it for only a few minutes. She plans to recite it to herself to keep calm as she is “going under” tomorrow morning. We have to be at the surgical center at 6:30AM and we suspect the surgery will be around 8AM.